Friday, May 29, 2015

To Be, or Not To Be....




What attracts you to certain people? Most likely, you look for qualities in others that you value. They possess characteristics that inspire you and stir your soul. You admire them. You respect them. They make you think. They make you laugh.

You feel instantly connected and drawn to them, and instinctively gravitate toward their energy. When you meet these individuals, you just know. 

Now look in the mirror. What can you do today that leads you one step closer to reflecting those same traits? I'm not asking you to change who you are so that you become this other person. I am urging you to become the best version of yourself. That is my life's purpose. I want to help you find those unique pieces in others and put them together to build your dream life. It starts with an open mind and open eyes. Look for the best in others and see people's true colors. Together, we will use them to paint your masterpiece.

Thursday, May 28, 2015

Wisdom from the Wizard




Let's stop looking at challenges as obstacles in our road to self discovery. Instead, try to see them as opportunities to show you just how strong you really are. 

After all, our deepest fear is of the unknown. Many of us spend sleepless nights worrying about what the future will bring or how we will overcome potential problems. However, the main reason we are so fearful is that we doubt our ability to take on that task. We don't have all the answers right this second. What if we fail? 

Usually, when we finalky do face our fears, we see how small they really were. We also see that we can handle more than we had thought. By taking action, we can take back the power we've given our fear and instead use it when addressing the next challenge. 

Yes, there is a chance you might fail. But you'll live through it. You'll learn from it. You'll readjust. If that's the worst outcome, than what are you so worried about?

Tuesday, May 26, 2015

Wake Up to Your Life




Are you one of the many people who wake up in the morning thinking, "It wasn't supposed to be like this?" You had a plan. You had goals. There was a vision.

But now, here you are, miles away from even a vague resemblance of that picture. You ask yourself what went wrong, curse the heavens, and decide to give up on the dream of a happy life. Others seem to have known the secret, but perhaps you just weren't meant to have what you had for so long desired.

Well, you're wrong. Firstly, just because others seem to have easily reached their goals by now does not mean they have some magic formula to do so. Furthermore, what makes you think they have reached all their goals? Perhaps they are just as envious of your life as you are of theirs. Secondly, if that dream was so precious to you, you wouldn't be so quick to give it up. If you truly do care enough about it, you will work to eventually make it happen.

There is only so much you can control though. If something is meant to be, it will occur, but perhaps not on your time schedule. Yet, instead of waiting for it, live your life working towards it. Trust that whatever your life looks like now, you are always a work in progress. Enjoy each moment you are given for what it is, and let go of expectations of what it should be. You might just wake up one day and realize that what you do have is better than anything you could have imagined.

Monday, May 25, 2015

Love the One You're With



How do you know you've met "the one?"
You already know and love yourself as a person. They don't complete you, but they compliment you. They inspire and support you to strive for more, and make you grateful for what you have. You feel as safe in their presence as you do with their absence. They see the best and the worst in you. They love you none the same. 


Sunday, May 24, 2015

Have HOPE




I am so thankful for my life. Every day, I thank the Lord for the numerous gifts He has given me (of which I am acutely aware I have not earned on my own merit.) I am continually looking for the silver lining, seeing my cup as half full, and generally seeking the positives in each situation. Even during the worst of times, I have understood that there is always someone struggling more than I am. 

Yet, I am no Pollyanna. There are days and times when I, too, find myself feeling neglected and unloved. When, in the midst of my pain, I see no way out, no end in sight, and certainly no light at the end of my tunnel. 

This morning, however, I was reminded that I must be grateful for all that comes my way. I need to be as equally quick to give thanks for my pain as I am for my pleasure. 

Life is never stagnant. From moment to moment, this world is evolving and transforming before us. Just as great experiences must end, so, too, must our battles. However, both shape who we become. Both are essential pieces of our journey. Both are chances to grow and learn.

Instead of wallowing in your distress, acknowledge your feelings in that moment and be mindful of the purpose behind its existence. Remind yourself that it won't last forever and that you are strong enough to get through it. 

Saturday, May 23, 2015

Weekend Whimsy





What is holding you back from pursuing greatness? Whether it's your own self-doubts or the judgment of others, you can usually find an excuse to limit your ambitions. 

In fact, there might be a million reasons you will fail at accomplishing your goal. The more lofty it is, the farther it may seem. Others might mock you, shame you, and attempt to crush your aspirations.

Don't pay them a shred of attention. I encourage you to dream impossibly. See through obstacles. Live beyond your years. Reach past the horizon. 

The only bonds that tie tie you down are ones that you allow. Today, let your passion be your guide. Draw a life that is outside the lines with colors that don't yet exist. 

Friday, May 22, 2015

Friday Advice



Why do we spend so much time worrying about the past? Some of us waste our days mired in regret and resentment, with our vision focused firmly behind us rather than ahead. Those people rarely are able to move forward on their path. Therefore, instead of growing and reaching their goals, they become overcome with problems and negativity that they no longer can do anything about anyway.

We can all identify with the need to feel in control. Unfortunately, much of what happens in life is out of our hands. You can plan for a sunny day at the beach, but if rain is looming, there's nothing you can do to stop it. 

That's actually the good news! You aren't responsible for every single thing that happens. You are, however, in charge of how you react to the situation. Once you understand this, you can focus on what really matters and be present in your own life. Value your time here. Spend it wisely. Continue forward on your journey, celebrating each moment you are given.

Wednesday, May 20, 2015

Who Do You Choose to Be Today?

I




Very few people just happen to fall into greatness. You are not born into this world a winner any more than you are born into it a loser. Instead, you are given a choice.

To truly become someone of substance, integrity, and strength, one must set goals and work hard to accomplish them. You must display unyielding resilience, yet maintain the flexibility necessary to evolve with life's many surprises. You must be dedicated and determined to your journey, yet find ways to be fulfilled and enjoy the process along the way.

And guess what? At any time, if you so choose, you can become someone new. You are who you choose to become. You don't have to allow your circumstances or other people to dictate your identity. You don't even have to be the same person twice! I find that the most interesting people are those who are constantly learning and changing through new experiences. They understand that you must let go of the old to make room for the new. They maintain their values and foundation, and yet are able to continue to be shaped and morphed. 

Whether you have a resolute commitment to the person you want to be or are like myself, a rolling stone, the decision is yours and yours alone. You are at the helm of your ship. Yes, life will probably throw you off course every now and then. But it is up to you to right your course. 

Friday, May 15, 2015

Happy Friday!



This is a real picture taken of this older gentleman who regularly rides through town in a tiny string thong. I happened to run into him several times in person, and after a while, I just got used to seeing him practically nude, riding his Schwinn. In fact, I don't think anyone would even recognize him with clothes on! 

This snapshot makes me smile for various reasons, but I'm sharing it with you now because it represents a true picture of courage.

This man lives life on his own terms. He doesn't change himself to please others, and he is completely unconcerned with what people are going to think about him. He understands that we can't control how others respond to us anyway, so one might as well do what makes them happy. 

This man has enormous integrity and sense of identity. He dares each day to be his authentic self, and because of his consistent commitment to preserving his character, he is accepted and respected. 

What are you afraid of? Let this picture inspire you to have the courage to face those fears and live the life you've always wanted. Yes, it will be scary. You might see that the more you discover who you are, the more readily you will see others' true colors. Some people will embrace you, while others will judge you and disappear. But the reward of living your authentic life is knowing that the people who did stay are there for the real you. Courage is not easy, but it's worth the risk.

Thursday, May 14, 2015

Be Brave



There are a lot of reasons to be upset. Turn on the news, and all you hear is about the various problems, violence, and afflictions in the world. It's enough to make anyone want to draw the blinds and go back under the covers in the morning! Truth be told, sometimes it's hard to maintain an optimistic attitude when all around us are people complaint. 

But have you ever run across someone who seems to always have a smile on their face? Even during difficult times, this person seems to find the positive in the situation. Do they somehow just not have the kind of problems you do? Is there life so blessed that they simply have nothing to fret over? What is their secret?!

It's bravery. They don't have things any easier than you do. Yet, in the face of adversity, when it would be easier to admit defeat and let ones hardships define them, these people instead choose to be happy. These are the people who see setbacks as reasons for comebacks. They see challenges to overcome, instead of being overcome by their challenges. They are bravely joyous in the face of despair.

Today, no matter what life throws your way, have the courage to respond with happiness.

Wednesday, May 13, 2015

My Wish for You


We all have moments where we feel week, overwhelmed, and unprepared. Days when it seems as if nothing we do is working. Nights when we feel unlovable and lonely.

What gets us through those times is a deeper confidence that those feelings don't reflect our character flaws. That  emotions wax and wane. What is constant, though, is one's character and integrity. 

My wish for you is that in those moments of doubt, you always remember your worth. Tap into your inner strength and rest assured in the knowledge that you are special.

Wednesday, May 6, 2015

Real Success



I have a variety of role models. They range from successful businessmen and women, famous athletes, great parents, inspiring coaches and trailblazers. Each person espouses different traits that I  value and respect. However, they do all share one commonality consistently. They have all had incredible failures.

When we see successful people, it's easy to assume they are one of the few lucky ones who were just destined to win in life. Sure, they may have worked hard, but now they've made it. Guess what? You are only seeing a snapshot of their life path. 

These people have tried and failed numerous times and in great magnitude. The difference is, they learned from those mistakes and built themselves up better the next time. These people know that there is no promise of good fortune, that bad things happen in life, and that they must continue to grow and learn through them. 

It takes drive and perseverance to achieve goals. Those with the most have risked the most. Those with the most always want more. Most importantly, those with the most aren't attached to it. They know that money and fame are just fleeting visitors in our lives. The only things of true value in this life are integrity and relationships. Those, they will never risk.

Tuesday, May 5, 2015

Your Secret Identity



Real heroes don't have to advertise. Being well known is nothing compared to being well respected. Kind acts are louder than any words. 

To make a difference in this world, you don't have to perform some public, grandiose gesture. People with sincere strength of character are those who do the right thing when no one is looking. They are humble and they are loyal. They know that miracles come in all forms and sizes. They are quick to listen and slow to speak. They sprinkle smiles wherever they go. They provide light for others' paths. They feel blessed to be blessing. 

They are secretly incredible.

Monday, May 4, 2015

Lost and Found



I don't know about you, but I am certainly not where I had planned to be in my life at this point. Decisions were made, I veered off my designated path, and now I  must create my own way through uncharted territory. Some days, I feel scared and lonely and I want to give up. It seems as if I've been walking in circles and my destination is getting farther and farther away. I honestly don't even really know where I'm going to begin with. But I'm trusting my journey anyway.

It's ok if we don't have all the answers right now. Each day is a fresh start to find them. As long as you continue to put one foot in front of the other, you will grow and discover what you really want and who you truly are. You can always change direction. You can always ask for guidance. Don't worry, though. You'll get there.

Saturday, May 2, 2015

Make a New Definition




What do you consider beautiful? Do you even think about it at all? I find that most women grow up in this country swathed in a blanket of messages telling us how to look, selling products promising to make us look better, and always reminding us that we are not enough. Little girls listen intently as their mothers disparate age their reflections in the mirror, or even worse, those of their young daughters. 

I could write an entire diatribe of the various injustices our culture commits, but we all have heard it before. I'd much rather give you hope, inspiration, and light. 

I'm suggesting a solution. Close your eyes. Let your mind be a blank canvas and choose your paintbrush. Now, draw beauty. What does it look like? Touch it. Feel its surface. Put your tongue against the canvas. Taste beauty. Listen. What does it say to you?

This. This is your beautiful.

Friday, May 1, 2015

Forgive and Let Live



I've spent the morning praying about forgiveness. (How else do you think I come up with all my great advice? Anytime I'm wise at all, it's because of I've got a great adviser.) People always say that to forgive someone is really a gift you give yourself. Once done, you free yourself of negativity and broken relationships. I agree that harboring anger and resentment are more harmful to your own life than it could ever be to another. 

However, I actually find it a bit ridiculous that I feel I have the power to decide whether or not to forgive someone. What makes me so much better than they are? It's not like I have led a life free of error. I, too, have made huge mistakes and probably mistreated or hurt others with my actions. Yet, because I am suddenly the harmed party, I qualify to judge them? Hardly! Yes, I realize everyone who knows me thinks this naive or even weak, but I think we are all forgiven the instant we transgress. 

We have so little time on this earth and a purpose so important, please don't waste another moment on holding onto hurt and pain. Open your heart to others. Let them in. Allow yourself to be vulnerable. Trust again. Love again and again and again. 

Tuesday, April 28, 2015

Create Your Rainbow



Have you ever let someone's hurtful comment about you or rude act toward you ruin your day? Even worse, have you stored it up in your own personal archive of negative messages to tell yourself?  We've all felt criticized, bullied, and judged. However, we don't have to give others that amount of power over our lives.

The kind of people who talk about you behind your back are going to do it no matter what, so please don't waste time worrying. Suck it up. They're talking about you. But guess what? Those people are the ones who are secretly hurting the most inside. They're insecure and scared and relying on putting you down to try to feel better about themselves. That never works for them anyway and it usually results in people distancing themselves from the negativiity- leaving them more alone.

A true friend and a person of strong character knows the inherent joy in celebrating others. They take pleasure in lifting others up and shining the spotlight on them. Importantly, they don't allow others to rain on their parade. Even if you are the only one who believes in your plan, be the best cheerleader you've ever had. Let the opinions of others trickle off your umbrella and fall into the gutter where they belong. 

Monday, April 27, 2015

Get Lost





I secretly love to get lost. Let me explain. I have spent most of my life on an organized, meticulous schedule. For years I thrived on planning and consistency- there were to to be no surprises that might thwart my perfect blueprint. 

Yet, as I grew older and spent more time and experiences alone, I realized that I got a slight thrill from exploring uncharted territory. No, this does not apply to camping as I am deathly afraid of the woods; however, there are moments or even days where I have jumped in my car and just driven. And I have found that when I travel to foreign countries, it is only when I get lost on those winding, antique stone roads and must ask a local for directions, that I discover the real magic of the city. 

I encourage you to throw caution to the wind every now and then. You can spend your life planning, but it's okay to give up control once in a while. Get lost. You just may find yourself.

Sunday, April 26, 2015

Don't Get Lost



My mother always warned me to never make important decisions out of fear. Don't you hate it when mom is right? I have written before about the dangers of making choices when our brains are in panic mode, but I've yet to address what happens to our deeper sense of self.

We all have some concept of our core. It is based on a set of values we hold true and a character whose integrity you protect. Not only does fear tend to lure us into bending our principles, but it can make you lose sight of the whole person you've worked to become. 

I have had moments, days even, when I feel so disconnected from that woman I know I truly am, I'm terrified I'll never find her. She has strength. She is brilliant and caring and outgoing and a good friend. She would know what do right now. And I look in the mirror for some trace of her, but I see this stranger looking back and I dive deeper into my fear.

That woman has been right here all along. The problem was that I stopped focusing on her, and instead chose to become emersed in my worries until my perspective got so blurred, I could no longer see her.

Don't let that happen to you. Hold on to the person you've worked so hard to become. Don't allow others to tear you apart or let your worries cloud your vision. Fear is temporary. Feel it and move on. And if you should ever find that you've lost your core, ask those who love you to reflect it back so you can clearly see again.

Saturday, April 25, 2015

Smile Saturday




Isn't it amazing when you realize that your life matters to someone you may never meet on the other side of this planet? That decisions you make today will impact the kind of life your great, great grandchildren will have years from now? That an act so small as a smile could make someone decide their life is actually worth living?

Your presence in this world, at this very moment, is no coincidence. You may have days where you feel insignificant and unnoticed. There might be times when it seems nothing you do is right. You may even feel powerless, helpless, and alone.

Take heart! Remember that even if you cannot see it clearly right now, you have an incredible purpose here. My life certainly wouldn't be the same without you! Be present in the moment and make wise choices with your life. It matters more than you will ever know.

Friday, April 24, 2015

A Spirit of Awe



Do you remember the last time you were made speechless? You experience that moment where the oxygen seems to have been ripped from your body and your heart stops beating in awe. All sound ceases to exist and all other images and objects are blurred by the majesty of the moment. You are incapable of moving and your mind is cleared of all thoughts. You belong to that moment and it to you.


It is easy to get lost in the monotony of the daily grind. We are focused on checking chores off our to do lists and rarely make time for adventure or the extraordinary. But it's out there, waiting to be discovered. Today, take a moment to find and celebrate a miracle. Once you take the time to really see one, you might be surprised how many abound. Open your heart to possibilities and allow yourself the joy of the moment.

Thursday, April 23, 2015

The Power Within You


I sometimes feel like my goals are beyond my reach. The obstacles seem insurmountable and I don't have all the answers right now. I wonder if I can do this at all.

But when I look back on the challenges I've faced in the past, I realize that I have not only lived through, but thrived in much harder circumstances!

Today, remember that you are stronger than you think. Stop waiting for someone to rescue you ( because that's not going to happen anyway,) and become your own hero. Have faith in your steps and courage in your heart. You just may find that you had the answers all along.

Tuesday, April 21, 2015

Fear



To succeed greatly, sometimes you must dare greatly. Yes, you are scared. Of course you are! But are you more afraid of failing than of not ever trying? 

I believe that fear is a natural, normal emotion with a very real purpose of protecting us. However, there has got to come a time when your faith trumps your fear. 

If you are ever going to grow, you must start reaching for new limits. Believe enough in the strength of your character to confidently let it be tested. Rely on your faith to guide you through the darkness. Take chances. Defy odds.

We may do all we can to lead a safe, small life, but no matter what we do, we will eventually face hardships. Worrying about them has never stopped them. 

We have only this one precious gift of a life. One chance to experience. One opportunity to change the world. One legacy to leave behind. Make yours a courageous one.

Monday, April 20, 2015

Be Good




It is so important to surround yourself with people who reflect your values. People with integrity, character, sincerity, and purpose. Those whom you can rely on and trust. Who know how to lead and how to follow. People who truly care about and are supportive of you. They reflect who you are and who you want to become. They lift up, yet keep you grounded. 

As hard as it is to admit, we need other people in our lives. We cannot accomplish our highest goals alone, nor should we want to. Furthermore, the decisions we make are influenced by those around us. This is why it is so important to consciously choose the kind of people you allow into your life. They are your team, your family, your foundation. 

But remember that just as important as being amongst good people, is being one yourself. You never know who needs you or who already aspires to be like you. 

Today, think about the people in your life. Just as they matter so much to you, you matter to them. You matter to me. 

Saturday, April 18, 2015

Mr Sandman...



When did you stop daydreaming? Was it school Fter a teacher reprimanded you for not seeming to be focused on the lesson? Or when you told your parents you wanted to sail around the world after college and they scoffed at the very thought of it? When, at the age of 32, you were told it's too late to have the life you'd always wanted and that it's time to settle for less? When did it become a waste of time to ponder the possibilities this world holds for us? When did we stop believing in miracles?

If we define the limits of our lives and thus, design the course, then surely we can be creative with the plan! When you decide to author your life, you have the power to make that story brilliant and phenomenal and unlike any other! 

For whatever reason, you will always be met with a doubter. Someone who fearfully creates a small, encapsulated, safe existence for themselves and then jealously judges your own creation and goals. 

Don't let anyone dull your sparkle. Continue to dream, to paint outside the lines, to leap off the path and into the unknown. If you had no limits, where would you go?  

Friday, April 17, 2015

Keep Your Eyes on Your Own Work




Why do we find it so necessary to compare ourselves with other people? There will always be someone out there who has something better, newer, shinier. Furthermore, you have only one glimpse of their life from an outside perspective. All you see is the candy coating. You don't really ever know what a person's life is like, and nor do they yours.

We complain that others are judging us when we are guilty of doing the same. Once we accomplish something, we must measure its worth against someone else and we become robbed of the pride and pleasure in a job well done.

This blog, and indeed the core of my life-coaching practice is to be the best version of YOU. This means that you  accept your own strengths and weaknesses, your situation and limitations, and you define a life of your own that you can be proud of. What does success even mean to you? What are your values? Your dreams? 

Today, I'd like you to devote yourself to... yourself! Everyone is going through their own battles, and you need all the energy you have to win your own. Stay focused and believe in yourself- I know you can do this.


Thursday, April 16, 2015

Use Your Pain

I'm 



I believe that everything in our lives happens for a reason. Our journeys were already mapped out for us before we ever existed. Each step is important and should be honored.

Just as we cherish fond memories and eagerly make plans for our future, we learn from our past mistakes and face obstacles that define our character and strengthen us. 

People say that we have pain so we can appreciate and recognize happiness. I'm not sure it's that simple. Anxiety and fear can be signs that we are in danger and need to protect ourselves. You may be feeling immense sadness now so that you are able to sympathize with someone else's pain who needs you. Your faith could need to be tested. You might need to see just how strong you really are.

What I'm saying is that, while we all want to feel warm and fuzzy all the time, ignoring pain is not the answer. Instead, notice it, and then make the choice to use it to get to your goals. Today, remember that you are so important that every moment of your journey matters.
Know that what is in store for you will be greater than anything you could have hoped for. Don't take a single moment for granted.

Wednesday, April 15, 2015

Be Here, Now



My first waking thoughts this morning were, "I have so much to get done today." Followed quickly by admonishing myself for not having already accomplished said lost and more so. 

Sometimes, it seems as if I am consumed with furiously  worrying about the future, while beating myself up for the past. This just results in robbing me of the present moment! 

Now is the time to live my life. I've got to accept the place I'm in as a part of the journey I am on, to forgive myself, to let others in, and to make the most out of the life I've been given. 

Today, please join me in being present in life. Let go of your need to control, of your shame, and your anxiety. You are enough. You here, now.

Tuesday, April 14, 2015

I Think You Can





There will always be doubts, excuses, and objections. It will take time. It will take sacrifice. It will take everything you've got. But it will be worth it.


Please don't be afraid to dream. Don't limit your goals out of fear. Find your passion and your purpose and make it happen. There may be a million reasons it will never work, but what if...? What if you can have and do more than you ever dreamed possible? 

Monday, April 13, 2015

You Versus You



Your greatest battle begins with every new day. Your enemy is smart, cunning, ruthless, and it knows all of your weaknesses. It's a duel to the end, and you must never give up. Never let your guard down.

Your nemesis? It's you. It is the critical, cruel, doubtful voice whose goal is to make you feel worthless and powerless. It doesn't believe in you and doesn't think you deserve love. It only sees your flaws, then magnifies them. 

If you are ever going to have the life you desire, to follow your dreams, to author your own story- you must overcome that voice. Be your own cheerleader. Become your own hero. It all starts and ends within you.

Sunday, April 12, 2015

Sunday Funday



In college, our cafeteria would have an ice cream sundae bar to celebrate each Sunday. It was a silly, simple tradition that I secretly looked forward to all week. 

I was that student who couldn't take enough advanced courses or be in too many clubs. I generally raced from one activity to another, and rarely ( I now regret) devoted any time to nurturing close relationships. I was simply too busy!

But each Sunday, my friends would gather together around the table and catch up over scoops of chocolate chocolate chip or peanut butter madness. I'll never forget those memories.

By creating these small moments of togetherness in our lives now, we can make time for the things and people who matter the most to us. These are the memories you will store in your heart. Take the opportunity this Sunday to connect with someone you love. It doesn't have to be done grandiose gesture to have impact. To the world, you may just be one person. But to that person, you just may be the world.

Saturday, April 11, 2015

What Will You Accomplish?



Some people see a blank page as their worst nightmare. How do I start? What if I make a mistake? What if no one likes what I create?

I'm one of those rare beings who gets excited tingles when I see a fresh notebook page and a sharpened pencil, teaming with ideas and promise. 

Does that mean I think it's an easy task? No! But the beauty of a new beginning is that it is entirely up to me what to write, which direction I want to go in, and who I include in this journey. I often change my mind, find errors in my wording, and doubt my decisions. That's part of the process! 

You don't have to have all the answers now. It's ok to be afraid. Now is the time, however, that you must be brave! Jump off that high dive and go for a triple flip! Even if you belly flop, you can be proud of yourself for trying.

Friday, April 10, 2015

Fun Friday Thought




So many of us get wrapped up in the daily grind of work, chores, and appointments. We are so focused on just making it through the week, that by the time the weekend rolls around, we exhaustedly use it to rest or we continue to over schedule our own productivity. In the back of our minds, somewhere between grocery lists and dentist visits, hides secret plans for a dream vacation, where finally, you will take some time to enjoy life again.

Why are you scheduling happiness? And why aren't you making it a priority? If you are authoring your life, choose to be happy now. If your job is miserable or your relationship a broken mess, do something to change the situation! Take charge! You CAN be happy and you DESERVE to be happy.

What fulfills you? What makes you smile? It could be as small as noticing a ladybug landing on your windowsill or as grand as driving to the ocean after work to watch the sun set. 

Stop waiting for life to begin. You're there right now. Write your story. Live your dream.

Thursday, April 9, 2015

Bravery




Have you ever thought of happiness as a courageous act? I've been pondering the concept of and the universal search for happiness for a while. It's meaning is as ambiguous and individualized as the word "love," yet generally agreed upon to be a positive state at the very least. 

It seems that, while happiness is accessible to all, only a few people can claim to be truly courageous. One must earn that honor through effort, discipline, and strength of character. What's so courageous about being happy?

Perhaps genuine happiness is harder to attain than we'd assumed. It takes just as much effort to smile as to frown, but it takes tremendous work to maintain happy relationships. Furthermore, when the world seems to thrive in commiserating over problems and failure, it takes resiliency and fortitude to maintain a positive mindset. It means trusting strangers and finding the best in everyone. It's found in second chances and hopeful wishes. It's believing in possibility when there's little probability. 

Each day, we make a conscious decision whether or not to be happy. Choose to be brave. I believe in you.

Wednesday, April 8, 2015

Take the Lead



I've been about leadership a lot lately. What does it really mean? How do I become a leader? What if no one follows?

Growing up, I used to idolize my role models. They tended to be focused, kind, genuine, goal-oriented, and inspired. They were people whom I trusted to do the right thing in hard situations. Their words matched their actions and their promises were always kept. 

As I've matured, I've since come to recognize that they, too, are human and flawed. They've made mistakes and grown through struggles. I see that they ask for help as much as they offer it. 

I understand that being a true leader is not about being flawless. It's not about how many followers you appear to have, nor is always easy. Leaders are humble, yet confident. They strive to be the best version of themselves, and then to help others do the same. They magnify other people's strengths and support their victories. A leader plays every role on the team at some point. They try to live by example, with integrity and honesty. 

As a leader, I hope to leave this world a better place. If I have touched just one person's  life, I will consider my journey a success.

Tuesday, April 7, 2015

Change Your Focus



I am the queen of worrying. There are actually times when I realize I've forgotten to breathe because I'm so anxious! One small doubt snowballs into a bigger and bigger dilemma until all I can see are my problems. I've wasted away inordinate amounts of time in which I could have been happy, productive, and positive.

Every moment we spend fixated on obstacles is one less we could have been focusing on solutions. 

You will always find what you're looking for. If you expect only problems, that's what you will find! Instead, search for even the tiniest hint of the good in your day to build upon. Once you look at the situation from another perspective, other possibilities will begin to appear. Remember, you are authoring this story- it's up to you to give it a happy ending.

Monday, April 6, 2015

Monday Message




This is a season of rebirth, life, fresh chances, and growth. You can almost feel the palpable energy of promise of something wonderful in nature's humming. Now is the time to believe in your dreams. Even if no one else does. Remain true to your vision and your passion. If what you seek is not there, create it. Have courage! What you're looking for is just on the other side of fear. I know you're scared and I am too. I'm terrified! But if I don't do this now, I'll never know. If I don't try, I'll have already failed.

Sunday, April 5, 2015

Easter Blessing



Have you ever felt like your life is just out of your control? That whatever you try fails? That you've run out of answers and run out of time? That the more you try to handle it all, the more of a mess it becomes? 

Guess what? You're probably right!

Leading a faithful life does not mean we have an easy road to travel. It does not promise that we have riches, nor even health. But what we do have is somewhere to turn to, to lean on, to take away our pain and bless our lives beyond measure. He knows all, sees all, and loves us all despite our flaws and wrongdoings. He is and will always be the answer. All we have to do is pray.

Saturday, April 4, 2015

Always Time to Dream




When did you stop daydreaming? Somewhere on that monotonous path to adulthood, in between coffee for breakfast and grumpy bosses' complaints. Between sorority dances and picking up the kids from dance class. When you traded sunglasses for reading glasses and school supplies for office staples.

Why do we allow ourselves to give up on magic as a necessity of growing up? Just because we're a few years older, we somehow believe that we must follow an entirely new set of directions in which our lives are dull, ordinary, and predictable. But who says? Is there some authority out there, ready to chastise us at any infraction? Of course not!

You have the power to create yourself at any age. Don't be afraid to deeply care, to take risks, to act silly! Start daydreaming again and choose to believe in the impossible. Throw out the rule book and write your own story.

Friday, April 3, 2015

Patience is a Virtue...



It seems that no matter what I've achieved, I wish I had done better, gone further, pushed harder. It's hard for me to recognize and appreciate the place I'm in today, when deep down, there exists a fear that I am still not good enough. Honestly, I don't even know who I'm proving myself to most of the time. However, I continue to belittle my accomplishments and shame myself for not having reached all of my intended goals by now.

Setting goals for ourselves is not the problem. But by holding yourself to impossible standards and continually comparing your journey to other's, you are robbing yourself of the gift of the present moment. 

Perhaps the reason we are in this place now is more meaningful than our intended destination ever was. Our lives are not random, nor are they ever a waste. Instead, we are all interwoven into each other's journey through a plan that is greater than our own. What you do and who you are right in this very moment matter. It's time to find the purpose in your present, look forward to the future, and let go of the past.


Thursday, April 2, 2015

Building the New




I find myself navigating the boundary between getting back to the "old me" and working on the person I want to become. It is so tempting to think that if I were to just be the person I was growing up, my life would be just as simple and wonderful as it was during my childhood. But the truth is, I will never be that person again (thank goodness though!) and even if that was possible, life has changed and there's nothing I can do to control that. 

We are constantly evolving from one day to the next. Like stones being swept along and chipped away by the current, so too are we shaped by the experiences we face through life. It is therefore not only necessary, but beneficial for us to change as we grow.

It is true that spending time and energy on the past robs us of the pleasure of the present. But it's scary to feel responsible for figuring out and working toward becoming someone new. This is a challenge we will continue to face as we leave the safety of the known and head into the future. 

The good news is that who you are today doesn't have to be the same as tomorrow. Instead of allowing yourself to get anxious over the task, look at it as an opportunity to try new things, to make mistakes, to challenge yourself, to create yourself! You don't have have all the answers now. Take one day at time, and try to enjoy the magic in the process.

Wednesday, April 1, 2015

Promise Yourself This



What does it mean to live sincerely? It means living with intention. Veracity in your vision. Meaning in your words and truth in your heart. Unselfishly, recklessly spreading kindness.

It means you make decisions based on your values. That you love until it hurts. That you laugh until you cry. 

You speak only your truth and listen only to understand. You kiss deeply and embrace passionately. Those near you know they are loved. Those far from you long to be in your presence. 

Figure out what you value. Then live your life accordingly.

Tuesday, March 31, 2015

Success Awaits



If you feel like nothing you have tried is working, like your efforts have all been wasted, as if you can't go another step forward... you're doing something right. 

No one creates a masterpiece overnight. Furthermore, you don't have a clear vision if you don't constantly question your work. A healthy dose of worry and doubt are a sign that you truly care, not that you truly can't. 

The key is that just when you reach that pinnacle of emotions, you must push through to the other side. It is when you feel you have absolutely nothing left, that you must rely on faith to forge on. 

Success will be there waiting for you- just beyond your fear.

Monday, March 30, 2015

You Matter



Sometimes I doubt my own mission. How can I motivate others to achieve when I feel like a work in progress myself? What do I have to give someone? Shouldn't I first make sure I am complete and whole before daring to fill others up? Does what I'm doing even help anyone at all?! Is anyone listening??

The truth is, I may never know for certain the impact I have. There may never come a time when I feel work on myself is complete and I am ready to now help others. 

That cannot stop me from putting myself out there, flaws and all. From reaching out a supportive hand. From lifting up others before I can lift myself. 

You have been put on this earth for a purpose, and your life is meaningful. How you live it each day has an impact. You matter to someone. You matter to me. I don't even know who is listening, but if even one person benefits from my advice and counsel, that is enough. 

When you toss a tiny stone into an enormous ocean, it will at least cause a ripple. You may not ever fully grasp the lasting effects of that ripple, but the fact is, you have just made a difference. 

Today, be mindful of your presence in this world. Your smile might be the only one someone sees all day. Your kindness might give someone a spark of hope they desperately needed. You matter. Act like it.

Sunday, March 29, 2015

Lift Off



There's something about a Sunday that simultaneously makes me nervous and excited. It's a day during which I stand on a precipice, peering over the edge at a long week ahead of me. What that week will entail rests almost solely on my shoulders, and I alone am responsible for making each day count and each of my actions meaningful.

That's a lot of pressure! 

I used to see Sunday as an exciting chance to learn more about and praise the Lord. As an entire day to devote to preparing for my week and to getting any homework done for my grad school courses. 

Needless to say, I long to return to those days. Since graduating, I've been struggling with direction, self-image, and yes, my own depression. 

We all face our own list of evolving issues. Whether or not we are aware, they shape how we approach our days ahead and the limits we set for ourselves. It is normal to experience these highs and lows, but necessary to remain present and mindful nonetheless. 

Whether or not you feel the same nervous energy when facing a big week ahead, I find it helpful to take a moment and see the fantastic, the magical, the beauty in some part of your day. Remember a time when the impossible felt possible, and you saw opportunity instead of obstacles. You'll get back there. I know it. 

Saturday, March 28, 2015

Choose to Move Ahead



We all make mistakes. We have done things we're not proud of and each of us has dealt with the consequences of those decisions. However, we have the choice between letting the past rule our future, or using it only as a tool to sharpen our focus.

Your misdeeds do not define you. Don't give them the power to rule one more second of your day. Accept the past and forge ahead! The less you identify with the problem, the more easily can you see your solution. 

I know it's not easy, but try to be kind to yourself. Forgive yourself for yesterday and look forward to the promise of a brand new day. 

Friday, March 27, 2015

It's a Miracle!


Have you ever met someone who had far less than you? Someone whose life seems impossibly difficult and whose troubles looked insurmountable? Yet, they had an energy about them- a twinkle in their eye or a slight upturned smile. This person was upbeat- almost happy! How on earth could they even make it through the day, much less with an attitude of... gratitude?!

Faith. Belief that despite what circumstances one is in, there is hope for something better. Knowledge that you are loved, that you matter, and that at any moment, your prayers will be answered.

Don't stop believing in miracles. Start looking for them, and they will appear.



Thursday, March 26, 2015

My Wish for You



I wish that my clients, friends, and family members could see themselves through my eyes. Where they focus on flaws and imperfections, I see beauty and character. They feel weak and disappointing, while I am in constant awe and admiration of them.

But the truth is, it only really matters how one feels about themself. I could list countless praises about you, but at the end of the day, you are seeing your life through your own perceptions about yourself and others. 

Whether or not you are beautiful? That is entirely up to you. So today, please look at yourself with kind eyes and a warm heart. See yourself for who you really are. Choose to be beautiful.